I have a lot of visitors everyday.. I kind of feel ashamed that I haven't blogged in a long time, but to be honest, I haven't been feeling good. But I want to share some news to you, and also just get some things off my chest. I'll be seeing a psychologist, and I feel hopeful, but also scared. I kind feel like
finally, and just the thought of talking to someone about things, makes me instantly a little happier. Hope is very important, and when you go without it for a period of time, you start to feel numb. I feel like I'm at that point, where I feel numb. Things doesn't really matter to me any more, and it's scary.
It's also scary that I've agreed to actually change. I feel scared to talk to someone, because I'm a mess. I've bottled up so much inside of me so I feel like I'll burst soon. So just the thought of sharing my most inner thoughts to someone is dreadful. Because I haven't really opened up to anyone. I know this all is going to be hard, but I hope it's worth it.
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| I actually look forward for the future.. |
